Thursday, December 24, 2009
Thanks again, Ricky Gervais
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
9@9 - November 10th, 2009
Monday, November 9, 2009
the 9@9 running commentary
Sunday, November 8, 2009
I review the reviewer
Thursday, October 29, 2009
I claim to be good at math
Monday, October 26, 2009
Copy Cat
Thursday, October 22, 2009
I can't tell you how happy this makes me
My bride didn't share my viewpoint on it's artistic merits ("It's too early in the morning for that"), but she didn't stick around to hear my justification. Lucky you.
Lately, Ricky has been posting a link to a song or video on YouTube at the end of every blog post. I've been following most of them and while the versions he has chosen seem to have a similar theme, one that struck me particularly was Bruce Springsteen's live performance of "Thunder Road" from 1975. It's Bruce before the SuperBowl halftime show, pre "Born In The USA", before he was "THE BOSS", and it was a great reminder of Bruce Springsteen the artist. Someone I haven't seen in a while. It's been Bruce Springsteen the brand for too long. In the live version Ricky linked to, it seemed that Springsteen's only concern was putting the song across as best as possible and not about the light show, or confetti cannons, or playing the role of BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Anguished English
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Hicks and Gervais
Muse
I got a good look at my muse today.
I believe that people who want to write, but don’t, have a fairy-tale image of the writing process. They believe a writer sits down to begin work and a rainbow appears over their shoulder and they are washed in soft light descending from the heavens as the sentences and paragraphs flow fully formed into their brain and all that is left is their inspired transcription. In the middle of the afternoon other writer friends drop by and they all enjoy high tea while brilliantly discussing each others work. They use words like “transcendent” and “exhilarating”. Just lovely.
The truth for me is that writing is mostly lonely, and, when done correctly, an excruciating process that robs a little bit from you for every good sentence you manage to eek out. You have to give up just a little bit of yourself to make it work. When I explain this to my friends whom would “love to write”, they look at me as if I were someone standing alone in a parking lot clutching a brown paper bag that was leaking something.
“Maybe you’re doing it wrong. Why would you choose to do something that sounds so miserable? I thought you loved to write?“
Exactly.
It’s at this point that they slowly back away from me. As if they were afraid whatever it is that’s leaking from my paper bag might get on their shoes.
I know what’s in that little leather pouch of his. It looks small, but it holds a lot. Kind of like Mary Poppins bag, if Mary Poppins had been a sick twisted bitch. He has medical tubing, all kinds of vials, some tobacco, some wooden matches, and lots and lots of syringes and needles. All kinds of needles. Long ones, short ones, thick ones. “These is all of my little angels,” he sings to me. “They help me do the best parts of my work for you.”
There are times when I cheat. I toss something off without digging very deep and that’s it. The muse doesn’t come near me. Not so much as a pin prick.
But there are other times. Times when I go below the surface and so does he. I manage to mine something that is difficult to extract and he’s right there with a vein tied off and the needle plunged deep into my skin, sometimes through the bone and right into the marrow. Those are the good times and the sadistic little imp knows it. He revels in it.
I don’t know what he does with those vials after he fills them. Maybe he’s saving them for later on in my life when I’ll need it back, but probably he sneaks off in the middle of the night to the edge of town and dumps the contents into a drainage ditch. It doesn’t matter to me. Whatever is in those vials belongs to him now.
I wonder what it would be like if it were easier. If I could reach below the surface without the struggle, without the sacrifice. I don’t think it’s possible, and even if it were, I couldn’t do it. What would become of my nasty little muse and his finely honed skills? It’s not like a greeting card writer is going to give him a job.
Friday, August 14, 2009
It's shaped like a circle
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Who's Cody?
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Playing the game, whatever the cost
Sunday, August 9, 2009
To start my week on the right foot
Twitter, Facebook, & MySpace Unplugged
No, it's not a reality tv pitch.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
The efficiency of the U.S. Mail
"The recession has been brutal," Postal Service Chief Financial Officer Joe Corbett said at public meeting of the postal service board of governors.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Waco, TX
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
To Drive and Live in thr 21st Century
Thursday, July 16, 2009
It was sheer joy, I tell ya'
Monday, June 8, 2009
Review of Amazon.com
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Revisions Part II
Interviews are available on Beta and DVD format for the following:
Kristen Bell (by herself)
Kyle Newman (Director) (by himself)
Sam Huntington/Dan Fogler/Chris Marquette (group interview)
In addition roundtable interviews for radio/print outlets are available as well.
IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE ANY OF THESE MATIERALS. We also have posters available as well.
PLEASE EMAIL ME AT {redacted}
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Revisions
She just handed me another sheet, so it's revision five now. Very close.
In case you're lost in the shroud of my subtlety - revisions are very important in writing.
Unless you're writing a blog, of curse.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Writing advice from my iPod
Friday, January 23, 2009
Ricky Gervais Desktop
To honor his photographic (and photogenic) genius, I have created the Ricky Gervais Desktop. Be sure to share it. After loading it on your own desktop, load it on your mate's desktop, or perhaps one of your colleague's computers at work, whenever they step away from their desk for a minute or two. Imagine their surprise and appreciation when they sit back down and discover you've given them the Ricky Gervais Desktop!
1. Click the download button below that matches your screen resolution.
2. A new window will open with the wallpaper image.
3. Right click on the wallpaper image and select 'Set as Wallpaper' or 'Set as background'.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
It's no Bwana Devil
Seriously? 3D on my computer? No glasses? clickety-click-click-click.
I had to install Microsoft's SilverLight. Something that Redmond has been trying to trick me into installing for months and now they had a good enough carrot.
It was a quick download and install and one click later I would be viewing glorious 3D on my desktop. Here's my quick review:
Meh.
You can achieve the safe effect at home. "See the family vacation in 3D on your coffee table!" All you need to do is get all of the photos you took of say..... the monkey pit from the zoo trip, and spread them out on your coffee table. Voila! You are now experiencing 3D as envisioned by Microsoft.
What miracle technology will they come up with next? I predict a device that you can wear that tells you the time and weather via FM radio and only needs recharged daily!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Moss, man
I took this picture today while at an associates house fixing her computer. Her husband lived in the house for close to a decade before they were married, so the basketball goal is his. As you can tell from the picture, he either hasn't used it in quite a while or he's an awful, terrible shot. I snapped the photo to remind myself that moss grows and covers that which is unused.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
of Scorpions and Frogs and Ryan Adams
The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn't see any way across. So he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.
Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.
"Hellooo Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"
"Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.
"Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"
Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!"
"This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"
"Alright then...how do I know you wont just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog.
"Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"
So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.
Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.
"You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"
The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drownings frog's back.
"I couldn't help myself. It's just my nature."
Also, Ryan Adams announced he is quitting music.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
...and the pants were sardonic.
"Waylon Jennings is pretty cool, but I'm wearing my t-shirt ironically."
Ironically? Really? I didn't know clothes could do that. I didn't give up my Garanimals tags without a fight and now I have to worry about the subtext of my clothes?
I saw the Kenny Rogers tee on the rack before Christmas - at Wal-Mart for eight bucks. Does the fact that he's wearing a mass-produced tee only costing $8 increase the irony or does it make his intended statement ironic itself? I can only pose these questions as I'm not fashion-forward enough to answer them.
Then last night a friend of mine wore a tuxedo t-shirt during his band's appearance on the Late Show with David Letterman. "What was he thinking?" was my initial reaction, but then Ethan's voice whispered in my brain, "Dude, he's wearing it ironically".
I wonder if Dave knew.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
New Word Wednesday
Genericide - the death of a trademark word through common, generic use by the general public
The post contains good information regarding the use of words on the verge of genericide, and, as always, you can Google "genericide" for even more information.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Victoria Loves My Bride
Permission-marketing guru Seth Godin teaches a very good lesson about this in his book..... I think it's in all of them, actually. I have to assume the marketing department at Victoria's Secret does not subscribe to the School of Godin.
Though she loves their products, eventually she grew weary of the constant emails. The camel-straw arrived one day as she was perusing a sweater sale on the website from an email she had received, and before she finished browsing another email from VS arrived. She was going to unsubscribe, but learned Victoria's Secret has email settings for their subscribers. She changed her preference from "Spam-A-Lot" to "Sunday driver" and she now gets one email a week.
And then it got bad.
Like a stalker who starts coming around the house once you get an unlisted phone number, Victoria's Secret catalogs began showing up in our mailbox. Every. Single. Day. I like a Vickie S. catalog as much as the next guy, but every day? Who (over the age of 16) can keep up with that pace?
Here's the most up to date sampling, for anyone thinking I might be stretching the truth. The one on the left arrived last Friday, the middle one arrived on Saturday, and the one on the right showed up on Monday. My wife and I were relieved when the mailbox remained empty on Sunday.
I don't know how VS is doing financially, but they're putting quite an investment in my wife, one I doubt they'll be able to recoup. Those catalogs are all full color and I imagine it costs them more than a Jefferson nickel to print them, much less mail them.
She used to thumb through the catalogs from cover-to-cover, but now - it's too much. They go straight in the trash. In this case, into my blog, and then straight into the trash.
Today (Tuesday) is junk mail day. We'll probably get two.